Thursday, 16 December 2010

I'm almost afraid to say it......for fear I'll sound like a bad person.......and jinx this feeling.  I feel free.  I feel free to NOT be the perfect mother and not be the perfect housekeeper.  I feel free from judgment.  I don't know that I was ever consciously aware of Mom judging my abilities as a daughter, wife, and mother, but obviously, unconsciously I felt some.  All these thoughts came to me today while making lunch for my daughters and, of all things, cleaning the microwave.  The microwave was completely disgusting, and I didn't feel a bit guilty about having neglected it.  Instead I thought, "I know how to clean a microwave when the need arises, and that's good enough."  I gave myself permission today to NOT be perfect.