In one of my posts, not sure which one--I went back to find it but gave up, I talked about wishing people would spread out their condolences so we don't get them all in the first couple of weeks and then there's nothing. I am blessed w/ wonderful friends and family who have, at least once a week since the funeral, sent a card or asked how I'm doing or sent an inspirational email. Today I was blessed on three separate occasions.
First, a friend left a card in my mailbox at work to let me know that after all the initial condolences had begun to fade, she was still thinking of me. Second, when I got home, I found my cousin from Colorado had sent me a laminated copy of an obituary she had sent to her local newspaper. Mom was born in Colorado but was sent at age three, along w/ her infant sister, to live in Iowa after her mother was killed in a house fire. Her father and brother continued to lived in Colorado until their deaths, which is why my cousin wanted to recognize and honor Mom. Third, my tennis friends surprised me tonight w/ a beautiful card and a memory stone that I can place in my rock garden.
Yes, this keeps the grief at the surface rather than allowing it to be buried, but that's exactly where it should be. I don't want to forget. I don't want to forget the pain, the emptiness, the love of friends and family, and most of all......I don't want to forget Mom. And if that means that I continue to cry each time someone sends me a card or an email then so be it. They're only tears.
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