You gotta love small town Iowa where, even living in town, you can still see deer walk by your open window and smell the remnants of a skunk. Maybe they were all interested in the stale cornbread I threw out earlier this evening. I'm starting to regain an interest in cooking and cleaning. I made cornbread and chili several days ago last weekend, but the chili went faster, and Doug was tired of cornbread and syrup for breakfast so out it went. I finally got my Autumn decorations up last night. Seasonal and holiday decorations always make me think of Mom. Last year at this time she had out the wooden leaves that Dad cut out for her and she painted years ago. We were talking about bringing in our plants when the nights got colder, and what we were going to do for Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving is going to be really tough this year since it's the last holiday that she was with us. I will forever see her standing in the window in her red and blue vest apron waving to us for the last time as we went beep-beep around the corner.
I just realized that I forgot to call Dad tonight....that's two nights in a row that I haven't talked to him. I imagine the reason he didn't call me is b/c he knows I have a bad chest cold and hearing me cough and wheeze probably makes him think of Mom. I think he tries as hard as I do to remember Mom when she was healthy.
It was around this season two years ago that I got the opportunity to write some column pieces for the free weekly here in town. I sent them all to Mom. She printed them all out and passed them around to other friends and family. I came across the copies I sent her the last time I was home visiting Dad. She always encouraged my writing, but I always felt like I never encouraged hers as much as she did mine. Why did I always feel so inadequate when praising my own mother's writing? I could praise her cooking and her sewing and her cleaning and her appearance and her community work but not her writing. Was I jealous? I know I have no talent in most of these other areas, so did I feel threatened in an area that we had in common? There is no good reason so the lesson here is to praise often and sincere.
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