Today was Aunt Adelyn's funeral. The minister said something interesting near the end of his message. He said that on most gravestones, two dates are listed: a person's birth and death w/ a dash that separates the two. It's the dash that's the most important part, the part that happens b/w birth and death, but it's given the smallest space on the stone. He also talked about how those of us present at Adelyn's funeral are the ones who have to fill-in the gap b/w the birth- and death-dates. I think this blog is a little bit of my way of filling-in the dash for Mom. Reminds me of Hamlet's final words to Horatio as he lays dieing from the venom-tipped sword. Hamlet asks his friend to tell his story, and to be forgiving when doing so. Horatio was filling-in Hamlet's dash.
So here's a dash moment. Tonight while sitting on Mom's side of the loveseat talking w/ Dad and Ron, I caught myself doing one of Mom's mannerisms. When she would listen, she would rest her right elbow on her left hand and press the nail of her right index finger against her front tooth.
Maybe it's time for this blog to evolve from what I'm experiencing in the mourning process to recalling memories of Mom to fill in her dash. Maybe filling-in the dash is part of the mourning process.
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